Instead of Reston

Instead of getting on a plane from Seattle to D.C. at 9 a.m. this morning, I found myself lying on my couch, in my house, in Anacortes. Smiling. On the phone with Renee in Norway. Happy to be here, instead of in the air and on my way to a 5-day workshop in Reston, Virginia.

The last time I canceled a trip—the trip to Croatia for Qigong teacher training this summer—all kinds of wonderful things happened in that time and space created by deciding to just stay here, to just be here, to just be. Enough with the going, going, going, and doing, doing, doing. Enough already.

I wondered if it might be interesting to write about what unfolds over these next few days, since although I didn’t leave, I’m still not seeing clients again until next Thursday or possibly even the following Monday, and not teaching next week’s qigong class. Sounds sort of like a vacation. Here at home? Yes. What a concept.

And so today it began with that call from Renee. What happened next? What happened next was a handyman came over to fix my doors and also do some re-caulking that’s been needed ever since I moved in, more than a year ago. And while he was here, I spent nearly 2 hours in my basement. Cleaning and organizing and finding hidden treasure, like the key to my diary from 3rd grade. Not that I need the key; the diary’s never been locked. But it was fun to discover it. And it was fun to finally give my basement some attention. Since January’s flood, I hadn’t spent much time down there. Not only was I often away from home, but the memories in that basement were too painful! I was such a wreck when it flooded. But now my basement looks just as good, if not better, than before the flood. And I am pleased.

After the handyman left, I went to the library for a little internet time, and when I went back outside, the clouds had cleared, and the blue sky and sun were calling me to take a walk instead of driving to Bellingham to return some clothes and see a movie. And so I listened. I thought I’d drive to Mount Erie, but I must have missed the turn off, because before I knew it, I was at Bowman’s Bay, which was more than fine with me. I love Bowman’s Bay. That’s where I spent my birthday afternoon on the beach this year.

As I walked along the beach and then through the forest trail up to a lookout point, I took in my surroundings, wishing I knew the names of more trees and plants. Maybe I’ll start learning. At the lookout point, I practiced Kuan Yin Standing Qigong next to a Madrona tree. As I looked out at the bay and the ocean, I thought about how small I am—no, I didn’t really think about it so much as feel it, in a good way. And as I looked at the trees and the land, I thought about how long they’ve been here and how long they’ll remain, and just how fleeting this life, my life, is. I felt some sense of relief about how I and other humans just come and go so fast in the grand scheme of things. While twirling qi above my head, I laughed as I finally got it, really got why Master Li always talks about “no worries.” Not that nothing matters, but that there’s no point in worrying. And as my mom says, “Worry is the misuse of imagination.” So true, so true.

After my practice, I walk back to my car and drive home. I get in bed and listen to a couple of Full Body Presence Explorations. And then I feel like dancing, but after about 5 minutes, I’m hungry and eat a snack while fast-forwarding through Top Gun. It’s just not what I remember it being. And so I turn it off and write this instead.

Ta da!

Day 1, almost done.....


© 2009 Rebecca Clio Gould. All rights reserved.