I love Kuan Yin.
Kuan Yin Sitting was the first form of Sheng Zhen Qigong I ever experienced. And it couldn't have come at a better time.
October 2006, I was studying Asian Healing Arts and Healing With Whole Foods at the Heartwood Institute in Garberville, California. Drama was brewing; some of my classmates were problematic. Plus, I was recently divorced and still feeling bitter about it.
I went to this Kuan Yin Sitting workshop, having no clue what it would be like, having no clue that this Qigong would change my life, would start opening my heart, would have these beautiful contemplations and meanings that go along with the movements.
Today as I practice Kuan Yin Sitting, the first thing I notice is that I can hold my arms up overhead for longer without (or with less) discomfort.
Holding the lotus and crossing the ocean, I notice in the mirror that my arms could be up higher. And I remember being told at teacher training that it's time for me to push myself a little more, let go of my self-limitations and self-protecting habits.
Something Master Li has corrected me on several times is my hands, my fingers-- elongating and stretching them out rather than being too relaxed. I remember this during Shadow from Buddha's light. And I FEEL the difference. It's amazing. It's powerful. I feel the qi in my hands- they feel hot and electrified. Alive.
Looking to Heaven and Returning to Oneness always reminds me of being at Heartwood. The contemplation is all about forgiveness, and the line between love and hate. I remember how I'd always think of one of my classmates that I was in conflict with, when the meditation speaks of imagining the enemy, and loving and forgiving the enemy. And then one day instead of imagining this other person, when I heard the words, "Imagine being the enemy," I realized that I am my own worst enemy. Aren't we all? Getting in the way of ourselves? So now this movement and its contemplation helps me look inward and reminds me of the importance of self-forgiveness.
Just now I'm reminded too of how not forgiving others is just self-punishment. One of my friends recently went through a painful break-up, and she said she doesn't want to forgive her ex, that he doesn't deserve her forgiveness, or that somehow forgiving him would be like saying what he did was ok. What she fails to realize is that all this hatred she's feeling towards him, all the negativity she was sending his way, it was all just eating her up, doing her damage, not him. Forgiving and loving someone doesn't mean you have to like that person-- This is a huge topic. I could go on and on, but I won't. At least not right now.... I've still got a ton more forms to practice today!
But first, some more observations from Kuan Yin Sitting...
The 12th movement, Rain Shower of Apricot Blossoms-- Finally, a smile. A genuine smile. A radiant glow. My doom and gloom and heaviness was fading, or gone. I felt calm. I felt happy. This movement "represents the fully realized happiness you experience when you become one with heaven." Not so sure I became one with heaven, but this movement truly did stimulate a smile and feeling of lightness and happiness. A feeling of relief and peace. Joy and enjoyment.
Ok, that's all on Kuan Yin Sitting for now....
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